![]() ![]() I’m pretty strict because my mom was always pretty strict-but seeing parents in K-dramas break those norms encourages me to be more affectionate with my own children. I am also better able to empathize with my kids. Sometimes I watch a K-drama and a certain scene makes me realize, Oh my gosh, so that’s why my dad is like that. ![]() Watching shows that tackle themes like guilt, intergenerational trauma, and shame has helped me better understand my parents too. I’m more patient when navigating difficult conversations with my parents. Many K-Dramas are family-focused, which has helped me have better conversations with my loved ones. I could see my experiences reflected in K-dramas and I finally felt seen, heard, and validated.Īnd what I’ve learned from watching has significantly impacted my life. Watching these shows finally made me feel like I was able to validate the feelings that I had been holding in for more than 20 years-because I related to the stories of trauma, hope, and resilience. Due to generational and cultural expectations, expressing emotions isn’t easy for a lot of Asians, including myself, but understanding your emotions is at the core of mental wellness. And the tears always feel so therapeutic. In just 15 minutes of watching one, I can go from crying to laughing to being completely frustrated. K-dramas tackle those topics in a way that I’m actually floored by. In many Asian communities, there are a lot of stigmas surrounding therapy, family conflict, and chronic diseases like cancer. I soon became enthralled by the effect K-dramas had on my mental health. This content can also be viewed on the site it originates from. All of this made me feel ashamed for so long. Back then people weren’t as familiar with it-and I felt mortified when my friends came over and asked why my house smelled. When my mom made Korean food at home, I remember saying, “Why do we have to eat this? Why can’t we just have spaghetti?” I used to detest the smell of kimchi, a traditional Korean side dish that’s quite popular nowadays. I remember frequently thinking, Hello, this is not how Americans do it, and that made me reject my heritage even more. I also felt like my parents didn’t quite understand U.S. I just felt very “othered.” I often questioned where I belonged. Kids were eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch but I brought things like fried rice to school, which felt very foreign to folks in my community. But looking different from my peers, speaking a different language at home, and bringing a different kind of lunch to school made me stand out. Growing up I really didn’t like being Korean because I felt like I didn’t belong. My family lived in a small town outside of Philadelphia, and there wasn’t a lot of diversity in the area back then. I was born in Seoul, South Korea, but moved to the U.S. Below, read Chang’s story as told to SELF’s associate health director Melissa Matthews. After receiving positive feedback, Chang launched her YouTube channel and TikTok accounts, which discuss K-dramas from a mental health perspective, during the pandemic. Inspired by how she felt, Chang began using K-drama examples in her corporate consulting leadership workshops and sessions with clients. She found that watching Korean shows was cathartic, validating, and just made her feel good. It wasn’t until 2015 that Chang fully embraced her Korean culture-again with the help of a K-drama. Afterward Chang had to balance the demands of motherhood, marriage, and eventually graduate school, so she rarely watched TV. In college, Chang became hooked on a popular Korean drama, or K-drama, which helped her appreciate her culture for the first time. Chang, 48, a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT), everything about being a second-generation Korean American made her feel different from everyone else, especially in school. ![]()
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